I've picked today to come back to my blog because my heart is touched and it seemed a good time. I am vowing that I will post more. I am going to hold myself to a once a week standard, and hopefully I will be able to increase that. There is no good reason to blog. I don't expect many people to read it. I don't expect comments. I am always totally surprised and excited when get one, but I am not distressed or upset if none are there. And I don't even expect to say anything of importance. I suppose it is a purely selfish, self centered act. I like it. I like clicking on a link or typing in a web address and seeing my page. I am like a kid in school who keeps looking at her paper the teacher has posted on the bulletin board, even if everyone in the class has one up there. I like the play time it gives me with my computer and the fact that it looks like I am doing something productive.
So, today is a new start.
Yet, on this day, I want to take time to remember and honor a past hurt. September 11th has a different meaning now than it did 7 years ago. September 11th is one of those life defining days. One of those days that change how you think and feel about things. We all have those days all the time, but generally we don't remember them as one specific day, or if we do, we don't remember the exact date. We almost never share those life defining moments and days with a multitude of other people. Today our whole country is sharing.
9/11 is one of those days that you can mention and people will remember where they were and what they were doing. (Like the JFK assassination for those of us old enough to remember. I was 3 for that.) We all have our stories. I know I remember it exactly, not just the actions of my day, but the emotions as well.
I want to remember. I want to share the grief and hurt of the families who lost loved ones and the nation who lost a part of itself. I am proud that my town put American flags up in town in a display of remembrance. We need to remember. It is the right thing to do.
But I know grief too. It's okay to forget a little. It's okay to go on as if nothing happened sometimes. I think we have to forget some of it. Or we'd never be able to go on at all.